Our Blog Page

Welcome to our blog! We are so glad you are here! You can find information and other resources to help you on your journey. We hope you feel at home here and find something that helps you get to your next step. Take good care and enjoy the blogs!

*Note: All information is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for treatment. Please read with care.

4 Dating Tips on How to Date Safe As An Adult

Hi! Dating can be so much fun, but it can also be scary and intimidating. Here are 4 tips that can help give you confidence to know you are dating more safely.

Essential premarital tips to know before you say I do...

Hi! It can be hard to know if you have talked about everything you can or "should" talk about before you get married. Many of just "go for it!" when we get married. This may explain our astronomical divorce rates.

Congratulations You're Engaged! Now what?

Hi! Getting engaged is so exciting and there is so much planning to do. Although the hope is that we already know our partners very well, most couples have lots unsaid and undiscovered that they need to know and be aware of before they say I do. Here is a list of 4 questions you ask each other to help you work through areas before you say "I do!".

What To Do Before You Say I Do Finding the Red Flag in Your Parent's Marriage

Hi! Congratulations on your engagement or marriage! Being married comes with so many benefits! We want to be sure we do all we can to have a healthy happy marriage. Here are some tips to you help find the red flags in our parent's marriage so you can choose something different. If you feel safe and that you both are in a good place to ask and answer these questions jump right in! Remember to take breaks as needed and to not be judgmental towards either party's early child experiences regarding marriage.

A Crucial Conversation Everyone Should Have Before Marriage

Hi! Before you say I do, you both want to be sure you are clear as to what you are agreeing to. You may have a different idea in your mind of what your marriage is going to or "should" look like than your partner. One way to be sure you close the gap and discuss any differences would be to have a conversation or many conversations about what you both would like your marriage to look like

3 Questions Every Couple Should Discuss About Making Decisions Before You Say "I Do!"

Hi! Decisions are a part of life and it will also be a part of your married life. Before you say I do, it is important to have a conversation about how you both plan to make decisions. There are three questions below to help walk you through the process.

3 Key Financial Questions You Should Ask Before You Get Married

Hi! Finances are a big part of marriage. Before you say "I do" be sure you know what you are signing up for financially. If you are about to get engaged or are engaged these 3 key financial questions need to be asked and answered with our partners.

7 Simple Steps to Master Confrontation

H! Confrontation is a part of life. To be successful in relationships we need to learn how to confront. Confrontation is not always easy, but it can be doable. Once you learn these 7 steps, confrontation can become just another part of life.

How to Discover and Overcome Your Scarcity Money Mindset

Hi! Have you ever found a new way to budget and felt certain that was going to be your ticket out of debt and into more savings only to find the same old you waiting at the end of all your planning? Or maybe you have felt the frustration and shame over not being able to save any money? Or maybe, you keep spending money when you know you need it for something else like your bills? Maybe you can pay your bills and save, but you struggle to purchase the things you need even when funds are set aside for them?

Here's why... Your view on money is not being addressed. If you keep viewing money the same way you always have, it does not matter how great the new tool or budgeting idea may be. This mind set drives the way you view yourself with money. BUT you can uncover your scarcity money mindset and begin to experience freedom with your money. Once you uncover your money mindset you will no longer view you and money the same way.

Discovering the Dysfunctional Family System That Creates a Scapegoat

Scapegoats do not choose the role of "scapegoat", it is assigned to them by someone within their family system. The role does not work or will not last if the rest of the system refuses to go along with the roles.

Escaping The Trap of the Blame Game When You Are The Scapegoat

Being the family scapegoat is painful, confusing, and so unfair. There are several games that scapegoats endure and get sucked into playing and one of them is the blame game. The blame game is effective at creating and keeping a scapegoat in the their role.

Why Scapegoats Have a Guilty Conscience

Hi!

Scapegoats have a guilty conscience and this comes from being taught that they are bad and being accused constantly of doing "bad things" when they didn't. Scapegoats not only endure false accusations, they have smear campaigns ran on them. This is where their tormentor tells others how "bad" they are.

How Toxic Shame and Guilt are Used as Tools to Control and Create Scapegoats

Hi! Have you ever wondered how scapegoats are made? Well.... one way is through the use of toxic shame and guilt. When shame and guilt are used as tools to control they are toxic and this is part of how scapegoats are made.

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How To Survive The Holidays When You Are The Family Scapegoat

Being the family scapegoat is difficult all year long, but it can be especially painful during the holidays. This is true whether you are still in contact with family or not. That scapegoat hold can reach beyond contact and we can feel it during the holidays. It may be due to the familial expectation that occurs during the holidays. Watching or hearing others go to their family's home or invite family over can make you feel less than and that hurts! Here are some tips for surviving the holidays if you are in contact with family or not.

Why Narcissists Give You Garbage Gifts

Hi! Has your tormentor ever given you a gift that didn't make any sense? This could be because the gift was broken, 12 sizes too small or too big, a scent that they knew you don't like, or something that really needs to go into the garbage?...If this has happened or happens during the holidays, you are not alone!

The Dangerous End Goal of Gasighting

Hi! Although gaslighting is painful, the pain is not the end goal for the tormentor. Check out the blog to learn the end goal and how help yourself stay clear.

3 Boundaries to Set if You are the Scapegoat

Hi! One thing most scapegoats don't have is boundaries. We are taught to chase rejection which requires us to overstep boundaries. Here are three clear boundaries you can set today to help you to overcome your scapegoat role!

What Can Happen If You Set a Boundary When You Are The Scapegoat

Hi!

One thing scapegoats are not allowed to have are boundaries. Scapegoats live with lots of boundaries and rules, but they are not their own. This is one area that is unchartered for a scapegoat. When scapegoats begin to wake up and learn about boundaries it can feel scary to try and set some, but it is boundaries that make all the difference in someone leaving their scapegoat role.

Why Scapegoats Are Scared To Leave

Hi! When you are the scapegoat leaving can be one of the most terrifying decisions or moves you will make. It may be easy for someone on the outside looking in to see how wrong or bad the treatment is, BUT it is not as clear for the scapegoat. One of the main challenges a scapegoat faces is the programming they have endured by the tormentor and the flying monkeys.